Clowns, Cowboy, Cubs, Colleagues, Cryers, and Culture Vultures

Although my experience teaching in Taiwan was limited, and though my time teaching in Moscow has barely begun, I have noticed a few things about my fellow teachers. My general theory is that EFL teachers fall into a few distinct categories, based on their overall personality and reasons for coming to teach English abroad, which I call clowns, cads, cubs, colleagues, cryers, and culture vultures. A brief description of each follows.

1) Clowns: The clown (perhaps better called the misfit) is someone who, for whatever reason, just doesn't fit in well back home, or in a typical 9-5 jobs. Think Wilkins Micawber transferred halfway around the world, and you will get an idea of what I mean by a clown. He has an exuberant personality and loves to teach. Whether he is any good at doing so is another question.

2) Cowboys: Similar to clowns in the sense that they don't fit readily into a "proper" job back home, cowboys are in other ways 180 degrees from clowns. A cowboy comes abroad to drink, mix with the local women (or men--but I find it's usually heterosexual men who fall into this category), or engage in other less-than-appropriate behavior while drawing a salary. He tends to be of the philosophy that work is the scourge of the drinking classes, as his beer-tainted breath at 8:00 Monday morning indicates. In more professional ESL/EFL settings, the cowboy doesn't last long, but in some areas he will be tolerated because of the serious shortage of more qualified personnel.

3) Cubs: This category comprises kids just out of college, usually teaching abroad for an adventure or a break from school (a path I now wish I had chosen when I was just out of Columbia) before graduate school. Cubs may or may not show dedication to teaching while they are abroad, but they at least speak the English language well and are at least several cuts above the cowboy.

4) Colleagues: This category consists of serious, lifelong ESL/EFL teachers, of whom I have met a few at my current school. Eventually, they tend to migrate into managerial roles, as teaching in and of itself doesn't really pay enough to support a family. Many end up as principals of schools or in teacher training. I consider this to be about the rarest group in ESL/EFL teaching.

5) Criers: These are people who come abroad to escape some sort of unhappiness back home--a failed marriage, a family they despise, or general unemployment (at the start of my EFL career in Taiwan, I fit the bill of this category pretty well). They may or may not be any good as teachers, but their desire not to return to Nebraska, Newcastle, or New South Wales generally gives them an incentive to do whatever it takes to stay where they are.

6) Culture Vultures: These are people who are very enthusiastic about the culture of their host country. Their motivation is usually to transcend the status of mere tourist in the country and extend their stay. They are generally harmless and can make good teachers with proper training.